Posts Tagged ‘sciatica’

Herniating

At last, the verdict is in.

After eight weeks of sciatic pain, I got to see the spinal specialist. You know you’re getting old when your doctor looks like a sixth-grader. Anyway, he showed me my MRI results. I’ve got a herniated disk. The accompanying photo is not mine, but is very similar to mine.

I’ve never been so happy to have an injury.

The pain has diminished dramatically over the last few weeks, and he told me that “90% of spinal cases are cured by long waiting lists.” Time heals all wounds, including back problems, it seems.

Fortunately, my doctor is also a runner, and he said the herniation was not caused by running and there were no restrictions on resuming running. As with any other condition, I need to be guided by the pain. It’s like the old vaudeville joke: “Doctor, it hurts when I do this.” “Then don’t do that.”

Realistically, I need to overcome my severe hatred of cross-training and core exercises – if for no other reason than to give me something to do when I can’t run. The doctor suggested swimming, and I’ll see if that’s feasible.

It’s good news for the blog, too. Running doesn’t seem very funny if you can’t do it. I’ll be back on the road soon.

Out of the Doghouse

I ran for the first time in a month this morning – 1.76 miles at 9:59 pace. My right leg is still stiff  but I don’t have those horrible shooting pains down my sciatic nerve anymore.

I’m scheduled for an MRI this week and an appointment with the spine center next month. I’m convinced that by the time they see me there will be nothing to see.

It felt good to do any sort of physical activity. The other day I went with the Lovely Mrs. A. to the mall just to get out of the house. I spent most of the time in the car listening to the radio. I noticed that in the car parked next to me there was a guy, also in the passenger seat, reclining with a neck pillow and his eyes closed. It occurred to me that shopping malls are missing out on a huge money-making opportunity.

You’ll notice even inside the mall there are plenty of seats, usually occupied by husbands, and there are often chairs outside of department store dressing rooms. This is a waste. There ought to be a facility in the middle of the mall with a series of cubicles containing a large screen TV and stereo system, a recliner, a pitcher of beer, some buffalo wings and a big soft pretzel. Charge about $20-25 an hour. This way couples can look forward to and enjoy a trip to the mall and back together without one of you having to engage in any activities you don’t like. Wives will get to spend more time shopping – which will be good for them and for the economy. Husbands get to keep their wives happy without having to follow them around the women’s underwear racks. And they’ll also be spending money. It’s a winner for everyone.

Give it a cute name like the Doghouse or the Man Kennel or the Hubby Mill and women won’t mind leaving you there (unlike calling it something like, oh, Hooters).

If you like that one, remind me sometime to tell you about my other huge money-making ideas, like FlapJack-in-the-Box.

Better

No running again this week, and I had to toss out any notion of doing the No Excuses 5k on Memorial Day. Fortunately for once, I hadn’t registered.

My sciatica has improved significantly, though I still need one Vicodin right before bed in order to sleep through the night. I’m off the Flexeril entirely, as the muscle spasms have ceased. Strangely enough, I get quite a bit of relief from a hot water bottle placed on the most troublesome area, which is just outside my right shin.

All right. There’s nothing more boring than other people’s ailments. I feel confident that this episode is nearly over and I’ll soon be back out on the road. I’m not quite ready to give up my BQ quest, but I am considering training at PR marathon pace (8:30/mile) instead of BQ marathon pace (8:12/mile). Staying healthy is more than enough of a challenge for me this year.

Nerve-wracking

I didn’t run at all this week, and I’m typing this from a prone position on my living room floor. Yes, it’s yet another injury, but strangely enough, one not directly connected to running.

I ran 7 miles last Sunday and while it was a crappy run, I had no pain or twinges. Nor did I feel any soreness all day afterwards. But at about 4 a.m. Monday, I awoke with a stabbing pain on the outside of my right lower leg. Assuming it was a cramp, I massaged it. Nope. How about a peroneal tendonitis flare-up? Tried some ice and all I got was a frozen pain.

I took an Advil and went about my day Monday, but still had a dull ache. Monday night was sheer hell. I had migrating pain and muscle spasms deep in my right buttock,  then next to the fibular head behind my knee, then the outside of the right shin, leading to pins and needles and numbness in my right foot. I’m no doctor, but that sounds like nerve problems to me.

I was up all night with excruciating pain and I couldn’t find a comfortable position. Tuesday and Wednesday were a little better, but Wednesday night was ghastly. The stabbing pains were accompanied by muscle spasms. My right calf and thigh locked up. I finally broke down and made an immediate appointment on Thursday morning. My doctor is pretty sure (as am I) that I’m experiencing sciatica. He prescribed Vicodin and a muscle relaxant.

So now I’m hopping around the house like, well, House. But it beats running around the house like Jack Bauer, with all the screaming, torturous pain, and no sleep for 24 hours.

I have zero back pain, but sciatica can be caused by spinal problems, so I had an x-ray and will have a CT scan this week. Training is obviously on hold, considering it hurts to run, walk, stand still, sit down, lie down and bend. Other than that, I can do anything I want. However, recovery from this should be quicker than from an ankle injury or tendonitis. Technically, there is nothing wrong with my leg, just that one long nerve that runs the length of it. It’s firing off like the 4th of July and the muscles are responding accordingly.

I’m disappointed (again) because of the interruption, but unless some serious underlying cause is discovered, it will probably dissipate over the next week or so, and I can gradually get back to business as usual. In the meantime, I’m trying to learn to type while standing on one leg.