Posts Tagged ‘apparel’

Friday Five: Items for the Clif Bar Apparel Line

Clif Bar and Company, the makers of some of your favorite fitness foods, are expanding their operations to include women’s athletic apparel. To aid them in this endeavor, Running Is Funny presents five clothing items that are a perfect fit for Clif Bar:

1) The Clif Bra. It’s 70% organic, just like you.

2) Clif Shorts. Their “semi-liquid form shines when you’re working hard.”

3) Clif Soks. They keep your protein centers wrapped in a protective shell.

4) LunaTicks. A sports watch that will feed your soul and lift your spirits.

5) Mojo Head-to-Toe. The entire Clif ensemble, which will make you feel like you’ve been dipped in a tasty layer of creamy vanilla, decadent cocoa or smooth peanut butter.

Then you can drive to the race in this.

Good Argument for Going Commando

The Hereford High School cross country team thought they had won the county championship when they learned one of their runners had been disqualified, dropping the team to third place. His offense? He was wearing black compression shorts with visible white stitching underneath his running shorts, in violation of Rule 9, Section 6, Article 1b of the National Federation of High Schools rule book, which states: “Items displaying seams stitched on the outside of the garment in a visible contrasting color to the undergarment will be illegal beginning with the 2009-10 school year.”

Track officials defended the ruling, and noted that other teams had changed clothes to comply. But no one seems to have a good explanation for the rule. “Your cross country uniform is supposed to say that ‘I’m from high school XYZ.’ Philosophically, that’s what ‘team’ is all about,” said Becky Oakes, assistant director of the National Federation of State High School Associations. “The Spandex undergarment began to get away from that.”

The ruling received national attention this week, with Deadspin stating, “I don’t know if any post I’ve written for this site has generated more public feedback.”

And They Look Great on Overweight Male Runners, Too

The latest thing for the “fit momma” – maternity running skirts.

Spring Forward

I know many of you are dealing with storms, snow and other forms of severe weather, but here in northern California we have finally come out of the other side of two weeks of rain. It’s beautiful and sunny, and that means putting the cold weather gear away and pulling out the running shorts.

It will be months before I develop my usual runner’s tan, so for now passersby will have to endure my overall pastiness and contemplate why winter running puts color on my cheeks but not my legs.

Is there a better time of year for runners? You’ve hunkered down all winter, now once again you’re ready to set the running world afire. Visions of PRs, mileage completed and marathons conquered all dance through your head. Injuries, disappointments and bonks are just vague shapes on the horizon.

Getting rid of that winter gear is like coming out of a cocoon or shedding a skin. Now is the time to fly, or slither, depending on your choice of simile and running style.

I can be cynical the rest of the year. Today I’m going to bask in the optimism.

Blowing the Cover Off Diva Night

Until last week, I thought running was about shin splints, pasta, sweat, fartleks and “the wall.” Now I’ve learned that for some of you it’s also about clothes, jewelry, hors d’oeuvres, and fine wines.

I have eyes and ears everywhere, so I utilized my vast network of spies to ferret out the truth about Diva Night, a women-only event sponsored by Fleet Feet Sports that seems to be catching on nationwide. I’ve found mention of it from Annapolis to San Francisco, from Orlando to Buffalo, with Tulsa and Knoxville thrown in for good measure.

The amenities vary by location, but usually include goodie bags, massages, appetizers, adult beverages, shopping discounts and a raffle. And of course, what female runners’ event would be complete without the ever-popular professional bra fitting?

Some stores go the extra mile and have jewelry, salon services, chocolate-covered strawberries or baby cupcakes. But clearly the great appeal of Diva Night is that no men are allowed, unless they’re doing your hair or serving drinks.

As you can see from this photo collection from a Diva Night in Huntsville, Alabama, female bonding is a big part of it, with one participant in Orlando noting the absence of men “really changed the dynamic of the store.”

Fleet Feet’s motivation isn’t too hard to figure out, once you see the line of sated women at the cash register with arms full of athletic gear. But the other half of the population has money to spend, too. And that’s why those of us of the male persuasion should demand our own promotional night.

It will be doubly satisfying if we make it as stereotypical as possible, so I suggest we call it “Caligula Night.” It will be a testosterone-fueled amalgamation of Hooters, Gizmodo and the sports book at Mandalay Bay.

The possibilities are endless. Beer, buffalo wings, strippers, HDTV and motorcycles! And did you know that 70-99% of all men are wearing the wrong size shorts? I just made that up, but it’s a good way to sell shorts.

For myself, though, I’m holding out for an old-timers’ night (Emeritus Night?), which would include a comfy chair and a nap.

Do You Dress the Way You Run?

Does your running apparel correctly reflect your running status?

Ah yes, as if we didn’t have enough to worry about when it comes to suiting up and accessorizing for a race – pronating, wicking, chafing, bouncing – the list goes on and on. But there’s also the issue of what your togs say about what kind of runner you are.

Take a look around before your next local 5k and you’ll see what I mean. There are people who are “on status” for every level of running. Elite runners like Ryan Hall adopt a certain look that identifies them as runners at the top of their game. Middle-of-the-packers have their name-brand, but relatively innocuous, running gear. Weekend walkers dress comfortably in stuff they also use for other physical activities.

But others stretch the boundaries. Dathan Ritzenhein’s Nike sleeves were a subtle addition, but even elite runners have to be careful to avoid a look that screams “Italian triathlete” or “no, really, this will shave 10 seconds off my PR.”

You can go under status as well. For one of my first races, I wore 10-year-old cross trainers, tube socks, old basketball shorts, and a cotton tee shirt I bought at the Alamo. And haven’t we all seen this guy at a race? Nothing says “I last got off the couch in 1976″ than this look.

It’s no different for women. The ladies love running apparel, but they are equally conscious of how it reflects their running status. Forgive me for generalizing, but the lure of “up-status” gear can be motivating. Women who want to be seen as serious runners will abandon the bargain bins at their local big box sporting goods store for the name-brands, bright colors and flattering fits. This ponytail hat says “runner.” This one says “my great aunt needs a new hobby.”

You know you’ve arrived as an elite female athlete when you can rock the Paula Radcliffe look. If I had abs like those I would augment the outfit with a big neon arrow on my chest pointing down to them.

Clothes don’t make the runner, but they can make you feel more like a runner. Otherwise we’d all be out there in gray sweats.

Men In Tights

Women tend to have their body image issues during the warm weather months, but some of us guys have ours during the winter. We stave off facing them as long as possible by wearing our singlets and shorts even when the temperatures approach freezing, then we surrender only as far as switching to a long-sleeve shirt. We add hats, ear muffs, gloves and scarves until the day finally comes when we have to make a decision about our lower halves.

The die-hards will stick with shorts regardless, and I’ve tried sweatpants, warm-up pants and loose-fit running pants, all of which were bothersome for a variety of reasons. So, a couple of years back I tried a pair of running tights. I liked them a lot. There was no extra material flapping around, there were no sweat or chafing problems, they really kept my legs warm, and the compression effect was an added bonus.

But it was a difficult sell because, well, they’re called tights for a reason.

Guys will do almost anything to avoid looking ridiculous—though we still manage to accomplish that task with frightening frequency. Running tights are also problematic because we’re deathly afraid we’re violating the guy code big time.

It’s an ego risk to wear them, no matter what, but I’ve developed these helpful hints to minimize your discomfort while enjoying the benefits of this useful apparel:

• Dark colors only. Black or navy blue. Under no circumstances wear white, yellow or lime green. Designs will only draw attention to you.
• Shirt length. Shirt outside the tights, hip length. Modest without being dorky.
• Underwear? No definitive answer for this one. You won’t need them for support, but peace of mind is paramount here. That’s why the final tip is the most crucial one.
• Seek a woman’s counsel. Not as easy as it sounds. Women are used to providing support and affirmation when asked about how clothing looks. No woman ever says to another, “Your butt looks HUGE in that!” You need a woman who will level with you. Even then, don’t pay attention to what she says as much as the look on her face.

If she looks uncomfortable while she asks, “Well, how do you like them?” it’s time to go in a different direction. On the other hand, if she raises her eyebrows and makes a growling sound in the back of her throat, it’s very flattering but probably not the kind of reaction you want for running gear. (Don’t be an idiot, though. Save them for wearing around the house.)

A conscientious woman will also provide free periodic updates to her assessment, and will not hesitate to tell you when it’s time to choose an alternative.

Follow these tips and you’ll be able to wear running tights without undue anxiety or drawing attention to yourself, unless, for some reason, you’re trying to.