Outpost of the Odd

These Colors Do Run

With so many runners and so many events, the pressure is on to distinguish individual races in some way. Hence the rise of novelty races. One type that seems to be gaining some traction is the color run. This month they have been held in both Dallas and Las Vegas.

The Vegas race organizer helpfully explained the concept to the local news:

and a reporter for Las Vegas Weekly participated, but the photos from the Dallas race give you a better sense of the experience.

Yak Before the Marathon, Yack After the Marathon

Dateline – Shanghai:

The coaches of China’s national marathon team are personally raising chickens to prevent their athletes from eating meat that may contain additives in local restaurants as they train for the London Summer Olympics in Lijiang in southwestern China’s Yunnan Province.

They also buy fish caught in the nearby Jinsha River and procure yak meat from the local highland herdsmen because of increasing reports about lean meat powder – clenbuterol – being illegally added to pork, beef and mutton.

I’ll bet you didn’t know there was an entire advocacy organization devoted to the yak, or recipes for delicious yak momos. “Once you try yak, you never go back.”

Birth of a New Sport

Yesterday was Shrove Tuesday, so naturally there were a host of pancake races. But the folks in Lynchburg, Virginia, may have invented a brand-new sport without even realizing it.

Runners were testing their pancake-handling skills before the race began. A local reporter gives us this one tantalizing sentence – and no photos!

At one point before the race, there was a moment resembling a game of lacrosse as runners hurled their pancakes at one another for practice.

That’s right, people. Flapjack lacrosse!

Sure, college lacrosse is popular and there are professional leagues, but what is the one ingredient that would boost it into ESPN land? That’s right, pancakes. I’ve even come up with a league logo.

Let’s make this happen!

It’s Time for the Griddle Grudge Match

Shrove Tuesday is fast approaching and that means getting fired up for pancake races! Sure, we’ve devoted plenty of space to these events in the past, but this year calls for something special.

We have just received word from across the Atlantic that students and teachers in Westfield Stratford City will compete in pancake races for the grand prize of free pancakes for a year. The event is being sponsored by Crêpeaffaire, but best of all will be judged by its mascot, Crêpe Man.

This is excellent news for the kids but a terrible underutilization of Crêpe Man. If we’re going to adequately celebrate Shrove Tuesday, we need the Super Bowl of pancake races. Crêpe Man should run as part of an elite field to include Flap Jack and Mike Cuzzacrea, aka The Pancake Man.

The grand prize is open to suggestions, but oddly enough both Flap Jack and Crêpe Man admit to “looking for love,” sooooo…

Cute or Creepy?

They will be holding a ‘Stache Dash 5k next week in Golden Gate Park in San Francisco, and while the press release offers little description, I assume it is similar to ‘Stache Dashes held elsewhere in the country. Like the one in Tempe, Arizona:

If you can grow your own ’stache, you’re one step ahead of the game, my friend. You gotta sport one for the ‘Stache Dash, a 5k jaunt around Tempe Town Lake. Can’t grow one? Don’t wanna? It’s chill. You can glue one on, paint one on (or have our race day artist extraordinnaire paint it on for ya!), whatever strikes your fancy. And while you’re at it, throw on those short shorts, aviators, and tubesocks and fluff up that big hair. We don’t require retro attire, but we strongly encourage it. In fact, we’ll even give you an award if you have the most fly outfit and the baddest ’stache. Police uniform – now we’re talkin’. Sweatbands and retro sneaks = extra credit, you overachiever.

Bitchin’! But what lured me to notice the SF event was this accompanying photo of a dog, or statue of a dog:

Adorable little puppy, or the Satanic pet of Mr. Peanut and Mr. Monopoly? I didn’t even know those guys were a same-sex couple.

How to Become a Master in Wife Carrying

For some reason Yahoo! Sports chose Valentine’s Day to highlight the ancient Finnish sport of wife carrying. If you’re unfamiliar, YouTube as usual comes to the rescue:

But the video only shows you how other people train for wife carrying. You have to go to the organizers of the Wife Carrying World Championships to learn how you can become a master in wife carrying. I reproduce their advice here in full, but you can follow this link just so you’ll know I’m not making any of it up.

How to Become a Master in Wife Carrying

You’ll find the wife carrying enthusiasts in Savo, Helsinki, Central Europe, Australia, North and South America, in short all over the world. They are strong men and tenacious women. Most of these easy-going people seem to be characterised by placidity and happiness. Of course, with a few more serious looking devotees among them.

Attitude

The wife carrying is composed of humour and hard sport on a fifty-fifty basis. Everybody may choose what attitude to take towards the competition. The course is open for all to participate.

Postures

There are four customary styles to carry the wife: the traditional piggyback, the wife dangling upside down on the carrier’s back, thrown over on the shoulder and crosswise on the carrier’s shoulders. The style is free. You may also create a new personal style of your own.

Outfit

It is preferable to wear clothes which won’t be stripped off in full speed running and which are easy to hold on to. The carrier’s belt is the only equipment allowed to help in keeping one’s grasp. Some other tools known to be beneficial are a bunch of birch switches, swimming glasses and swimming slippers.

Life

The wife carrying is an attitude towards life. The wives and the wife carriers are not afraid of challenges or burdens. They push their way persistently forward, holding tightly, generally with a twinkle in the eyes.

Eroticism

You can sense the excitement in the air during the wife carrying competition. The core of the race is made of a woman, a man and their relationship. The wife carrying and eroticism have a lot in common. Intuitive understanding of the signals sent by the partner and becoming one with the partner are essential in both of them – sometimes also whipping.

Wife

According to the rules the minimum weight of the wife is 49 kilos. If it is less, the wife will be burdened with such a heavy rucksack that the total weight is 49 kilos. Generally the best wife is the wife of one’s own, all the more if she is harmonious, gentle and able to keep her balance while riding on the shoulders of her man.

Track

The traditional track for the wife carrying consists of sand, forested terrain, a water obstacle and two log hurdles. If your style is “the wife dangling upside down”, you have better to remember that in the water pool the wife’s head is likely to go under the water.

Rhythm

It is of great importance to find a mutual rhythm. I the wife on the man’s back is rocking out of time, the speed slows down. When the rhythm is good, the wife and the carrier become one accompanying the motions of each other. It is advisable to practise in order to find the mutual rhythm before the competition.

Training

It is possible to train for the wife carrying competition everywhere in the middle of the daily routines: in the bath, in the super market, in the playground or in the body building centre. The wife carrying is good for your relationship.

It’s Valentine’s Day and (Foam) Presidents Day!

We’ve featured Undie Runs many times on Running Is Funny, so there didn’t seem to be anything special about the upcoming Cupid’s Undie Run in Washington, DC. That is, until The Hill broke the story that the giant foam-head Presidents would also run the race.

The Presidents entertain the crowd between innings at Washington Nationals home games with a race around the field. I don’t know who will win the Undie Run, but I’m 100% certain it won’t be Teddy.

You might think it’s ridiculous to have foam-head Presidents accompany you in a race, but, as today’s headlines remind us, “Foam a friend to runners.”