Outpost of the Odd

Australian Race Memorializes Athlete’s Escape from Police

The Ben Cousins Biathlon could turn out to be the ultimate hash run.

Ben Cousins is an Australian footballer. In February 2006, he was driving along a road in Perth with his girlfriend when he stumbled upon a police sobriety checkpoint. His reaction is the stuff of legend.

Cousins abandoned his vehicle and his girlfriend in the middle of the road, ran through backyards, jumped fences, and decided his best avenue of escape was to cross the Canning River. He swam halfway, thought better of it, and reversed course. Once again on dry land, he ran a considerable distance to the Blue Water Grill, where he denied his identity and demanded a phone call.

On the fifth anniversary of his bolt to freedom, racers will reenact his feat – an achievement much like that of Pheidippides. Organizers are searching for home owners who will allow runners to use their backyards for the fence-jumping portions.

“I saw the humour in some of the things he did,” said race organizer Damon Bull.

Female Runners Urged to Lay an Egg

The breathless headline from ABC News reads:

Female Athletes Are Too Fit To Get Pregnant

Women in Sports Who Train Too Hard Urged to Freeze Their Eggs Before It’s Too Late

First we learn your uterus can fall out, and now we discover that if it stays in, it might not work!

My advice is to drop this story in the circular file. The article fails to mention that it’s also pretty difficult to conceive if you’re overweight, out-of-shape and feel miserable about yourself. So ladies, get out on the road and keep in your eggs in your basket, where they belong.

World’s Most Extreme Race Has One Finisher

This puts any struggles we might have while running in perspective. The “La Ultra – The High” ultramarathon is a 138-mile race that traverses a Himalayan pass at 17,700 feet. The entire race is above 11,000 feet in altitude, and featured a small avalanche.

Only three people could be persuaded to run it, and only one finished – Mark Cockbain covered the distance in 48 hours and 50 minutes.

Why would runners do something this extreme?

“Part of it is the democratization of the marathon. When the marathon is ho-hum, people start to jump up to 50 kilometers or 50 miles and they enjoy the challenge,” said Bryon Powell of iRunFar.com.

There Is No Female Version of This Workout

“Chug it! Chug it! SPRINT!” It’s a long video, but the payoff is in the last minute if you want to skip ahead.

Running Blog Post of the Year

No set-up will adequately prepare you for this one. Just read it in its entirety.

Save Money on Singlets and Shorts!

David Palermo doesn’t need running shoes, or any other fancy apparel. He won his 5k easily in 16:58, which may not seem such an amazing time to you, but David and the rest of the field of 50 runners ran the race stark naked.

The Wreck Beach Bare Buns Run benefited Vancouver’s most famous clothing-optional beach.

“A lot of people think that it can be painful. I don’t mind it all. It’s a lot of fun. Fortunately it is only five K. It’s not like I am running a marathon,” said second-place finisher Kevin McGuinness.

The race is guided by this philosophy:

While you are on this Earth you have one temple that you live in forever, regardless of what your outer surroundings might be, and that is your body. And if you can accept your body you are much more tolerant and accepting of other people on this planet. If everybody were naturists we would not have the wars that we have. There would be peace on this planet.

Probably so. Where would you keep your grenades?

Act Now and We’ll Send You a Second One Free!

Here’s an ad for the Elliptigo, a contraption marketed as “The Bike for Runners.”

I’m inclined to agree with the commenter who wrote, “They just needed team shirts that all said Team Doosh!”