BQ or Bust

The Best $54 I Ever Spent

It was a good running week, as long as you ignore my getting lost on the No Boundaries route for the second time in two weeks. I ran a two-mile loop instead of the 1.75 mile loop. This made for a better workout but it’s getting embarrassing.

It was a seven-mile week at a 9:16 average pace, but this morning I ran my regular 1.75 mile loop at 8:29 pace, so it’s time to increase mileage. Next week I’ll run the prescribed distances with the NoBo group on Tuesday and Thursday, and 2.4 miles on Saturday and Sunday.

The improvement in running is noteworthy because this week I also began my swimming lessons – four days of a half-hour each. Monday was spent getting acquainted with the water, which wasn’t a problem for me, but some of the other students have a primeval fear of it.

Tuesday was kickboard day, and I was having a tough time of it. No matter how much kicking I did, I remained in one spot. It was frustrating but I had a major breakthrough on Wednesday when I did one simple thing – I got rid of the kickboard.

Suddenly I was moving through the water like this guy:

OK, maybe not, but everything worked as advertised. On Thursday we added arm strokes, and although I thought tying it all together would be difficult, it was actually easier. The arm strokes and leg kicks worked in unison, I had my head down in proper position, and I swam across the pool.

You might think it’s hard to get excited about doing something that eight-year-olds are doing better than you at the same time down at the other end of the pool, but I was overjoyed.

I spent the rest of the session practicing my newfound skill, and worked further on my own on Friday. The instructor was able to give me pointers on side-breathing, and I need more practice not lifting my head to breathe, but really, everything went… swimmingly.

If I had known I could progress this far after two hours of instruction and a $54 investment, I would have done this, oh, about 30 years ago.

I have another four lessons this week, but I think I finally found cross-training I can enjoy. I find it’s easier on my muscles than I thought, but it’s a lot more cardio than I thought, too. It feels kind of like running intervals.

I’m not going to turn this into a swimming blog, but it was a nice reminder of the feeling I got when I first started running. We get so caught up in PRs and training plans that we forget how neat it is just to do a sport.

No Boundaries, But No Map Either

Tuesday was opening night of the No Boundaries couch-to-5k training program, which I joined in order to avoid reinjury. There are about 60 people in the group, with about 20 runners. The male/female ratio is about 1:10. After a few form drills, we set out on our one-mile run through the park.

I wanted to be strictly low-key, so I tucked into the fifth position and held it. We worked our way around the first loop at about 11-minute pace. I was happy to shuffle along, since the temperature was in the upper-80s. As we began our second and final loop, the folks in front of me started to flag a little. I couldn’t slow down anymore so I gradually eased past them into the lead. I was comfortable, so I started looking around, thinking about my form, and trying to make sure I didn’t slam into any runners who were coming in the opposite direction on the narrow trail.

Pretty soon I’m running past the baseball diamonds and thinking to myself, “This doesn’t look familiar.” I turned around and found myself all alone, not a runner in sight. I looked down at my Garmin and it read 1.21 miles. Ooops. Somehow I missed the finish line and just kept going. I circled back to catch the tail end of the group, but no one seemed to have noticed.

We then did about 20 minutes of stretching, which seemed excessive to me, and that was it. We did 1.5 miles on Thursday night, but this time I stayed in front and ran no further than I was supposed to. I ran on my own yesterday and today, completing a six mile week at an average pace of 9:23. That’s still pretty slow but I’m trying to be patient.

Tomorrow my swimming lessons begin. It’s eight half-hour classes over a two-week period, so we’ll know pretty quickly if I sink or swim. I spent a lot of time in the pool this week, getting comfortable. I’m still not breathing properly, but I expect the lessons will improve my technique.

It’s going to be a busy two weeks, with swimming in the morning and running in the evening – and, oh yeah, I still have to work – but it beats sciatica to hell anyway.

Waiting to Exhale

It was nice to get back out on the road again, even in a limited way. I ran a total of 7 miles this week, averaging a 9:20 pace. For the foreseeable future, I’ll run only four days a week, but I have added two days of cross-training – one of light weights and one of swimming.

Well, I can’t really call it swimming yet because, hard as it may be to believe, I never learned to swim. I can float without a problem and I have snorkeled in deep water while wearing a vest, but my “swimming” can just about get me across a pool, frog-style, as long as I can hold my breath.

Once out of your teens, you’re too embarrassed to try to learn to swim because you think you’ll look stupid. But now that I’m 51 years old, I look stupid trying to do anything, so I might as well learn to swim. I signed up for adult swimming lessons. They begin next week.

I don’t want to go in completely clueless, so I did a a little Internet research on swimming. I learned that in order to swim properly you have to exhale into the water and turn your head to inhale. Apparently this is the biggest hurdle for beginning swimmers and I understand why. Air in your lungs makes you float. Air out of your lungs makes you sink. Mentally overcoming that calculus is a challenge.

So I headed out to the pool – early, before anyone else showed up – and I practiced breathing. Even though I’ve been doing it all my life, it turns out I need some work on it. I have to break my bad habit of holding my breath underwater, then trying to exhale and inhale in the short time my head is out of the water. Chlorine is so tasty.

Anyway, I learned you can get a pretty good aerobic workout simply by lying face down in the water and blowing bubbles out of your nose. Twenty minutes of that and I felt as though I had been doing hill repeats. Still, there is a little spark of excitement whenever you try something new, even if you stink at it. I’m looking forward to my lessons.

You might think I am now on the long road to triathlons, and I could be, except for one thing.

I never learned to ride a bike.

Why Did the Chicken Cross-Train?

And so begins my 39th comeback.

Thursday I completed a slow jog of my favorite 1.75 mile loop. I ran gingerly but comfortably. I spent the rest of the day anxiously waiting for the pain to begin, but I felt fine. And all day Friday, too.

It being 103 degrees yesterday, I moseyed over to the fitness center and did an easy circuit with minimum weight – biceps, triceps, row, lats and shoulders. I didn’t want to risk anything that might strain my back. Then 20 minutes of low speed on the recumbent stationary bike. One more set of weights and done. Wow. Turns out cross-training doesn’t have to be excruciating after all.

This morning I got up early for another 1.75 mile loop. I managed a 9:30 pace but I am badly out of running shape. In order to avoid overtraining and reinjury, I’m going to sign up for one of those Couch-to-5k training programs – the No Boundaries program sponsored by Fleet Feet and New Balance. Following the training plan we’ll keep me from building up mileage too fast, and running with newbies will keep me from trying to speed up too much. Cross-training is built into the schedule so it should be perfect.

“Staying injury-free” isn’t a sexy goal, but it’s one I’ve overlooked too many times. Better to be a 5k guy who runs than a marathoner who can’t.

Bacteria Humidor

That’s my description of the modern commercial airliner. I was set to begin the glacial process of returning to running fitness when I got slapped down by a nasty flu. Surely it has nothing to do with being crammed into that aircraft for five hours.

I’m no germophobe, but the next time I have to fly I’m covering myself in Saran wrap.

Herniating

At last, the verdict is in.

After eight weeks of sciatic pain, I got to see the spinal specialist. You know you’re getting old when your doctor looks like a sixth-grader. Anyway, he showed me my MRI results. I’ve got a herniated disk. The accompanying photo is not mine, but is very similar to mine.

I’ve never been so happy to have an injury.

The pain has diminished dramatically over the last few weeks, and he told me that “90% of spinal cases are cured by long waiting lists.” Time heals all wounds, including back problems, it seems.

Fortunately, my doctor is also a runner, and he said the herniation was not caused by running and there were no restrictions on resuming running. As with any other condition, I need to be guided by the pain. It’s like the old vaudeville joke: “Doctor, it hurts when I do this.” “Then don’t do that.”

Realistically, I need to overcome my severe hatred of cross-training and core exercises – if for no other reason than to give me something to do when I can’t run. The doctor suggested swimming, and I’ll see if that’s feasible.

It’s good news for the blog, too. Running doesn’t seem very funny if you can’t do it. I’ll be back on the road soon.

Out of the Doghouse

I ran for the first time in a month this morning – 1.76 miles at 9:59 pace. My right leg is still stiff  but I don’t have those horrible shooting pains down my sciatic nerve anymore.

I’m scheduled for an MRI this week and an appointment with the spine center next month. I’m convinced that by the time they see me there will be nothing to see.

It felt good to do any sort of physical activity. The other day I went with the Lovely Mrs. A. to the mall just to get out of the house. I spent most of the time in the car listening to the radio. I noticed that in the car parked next to me there was a guy, also in the passenger seat, reclining with a neck pillow and his eyes closed. It occurred to me that shopping malls are missing out on a huge money-making opportunity.

You’ll notice even inside the mall there are plenty of seats, usually occupied by husbands, and there are often chairs outside of department store dressing rooms. This is a waste. There ought to be a facility in the middle of the mall with a series of cubicles containing a large screen TV and stereo system, a recliner, a pitcher of beer, some buffalo wings and a big soft pretzel. Charge about $20-25 an hour. This way couples can look forward to and enjoy a trip to the mall and back together without one of you having to engage in any activities you don’t like. Wives will get to spend more time shopping – which will be good for them and for the economy. Husbands get to keep their wives happy without having to follow them around the women’s underwear racks. And they’ll also be spending money. It’s a winner for everyone.

Give it a cute name like the Doghouse or the Man Kennel or the Hubby Mill and women won’t mind leaving you there (unlike calling it something like, oh, Hooters).

If you like that one, remind me sometime to tell you about my other huge money-making ideas, like FlapJack-in-the-Box.