Run Fast or Squeal Like a Pig

Running from zombies is one thing, but the organizers of Fustercluck have come up with something even more frightening: running from hillbillies.

If the execution matches the concept, we are well on the way to what the organizers promise to be “the most disturbing All American 5k obstacle run in the country.”

Details are sparse, but intriguing:

You will be hunted by Deliverance type Hillbillies and there is a strong chance you will be kidnapped! At the finish line you will enter our wacky Redneck Olympic Games arena where you can play games like chainsaw mud drag racing, shoot the hipster, human horse racing, dumpster diving, mud wrestling, drag racing (think about this?!), mud belly flop competition, masterbaiting (fencing with fishing rods!), toilet seat horseshoes and many more insane games! What a FUSTERCLUCK!

This will be an all day party with way too much beer, awesome food, rock, country, bluegrass, weird carnival bands and absurdly funny Fustercluck comedians.

It looks like it is planned for October in Southern California, where the only hillbillies are these folks.

I’m always up for a round of shoot the hipster, but the iconic scene in Deliverance doesn’t exactly lend itself to wacky comedy, so this is a bold move. We’ll be watching for more details. Y’all come back now, y’hear?