The Carnival of Running #14

Welcome to the 14th edition of The Carnival of Running!

Wish I could embed this video, but it’s worth following the link to see a short clip of participants in the Minneapolis Winter Carnival Run.

PreClassic.com has lots of video of past Prefontaine Classics.

Just Your Average Joggler informs us that refined sugars are addictive. This fails, however, to explain the Kenyan Secret.

Blair at Run to Win shows us what you have to eat to prepare for a 50-miler, which, as you might suspect, includes just about everything.

Running and Rambling learns from The Biggest Loser.

In the “Duh” category, we have the news that running a marathon is a net benefit for your body, and that you can’t totally change your body in six weeks with three 20-minute exercise sessions a week.

Run DMZ wants to know who’s wearing “revealing clothing” at the gym.

If clothing is a problem, a lawyer for one of the Naked Pumpkin 12 claims the race is “a form of artistic expression” and asks one of mankind’s timeless questions: “How does one prove that anyone saw a defendant’s vulva in the excitement of the run?”

How about funny clothing? Paul Fernandez is now the fastest person ever to run a marathon dressed as a clown. Not content to rest on his laurels, his next goal is to set the marathon record for a runner dressed as Father Christmas. Ah, but can he wax a chump like a candle?

The Great Aloha Run is looking for a few good Marines to run the race in formation while chanting their cadences.

Speaking of Marines, many of you know what it’s like to run the Marine Corps Marathon, but I’ll bet you don’t know what it’s like to “run” the Marine Corps Marathon.

Unless you’re a Native American, you probably won’t get a chance to run the Fort Robinson Outbreak Spiritual Run.

In Britain there’s a proposal to cut youth crime by teaching high school students how to free run. Wouldn’t that just make it easier for them to evade police?

The British teach us that not only is running funny, but so is jumping. Long jumper Jonathan Moore leapt naked from the roof of his house. My favorite part of the story is this reporter’s gem: “His fall, which was estimated at between six and seven metres, was broken when he hit the canopy of Mr Labuschagne’s Ford Bantam pick-up truck.” Apparently, Moore had recently long-jumped 7.37 meters, so maybe he was just going for a personal best. I’m sure he stuck the landing.

How to deal with indoor running boredom? Well, you could try double features, but be aware you can’t set an indoor marathon record unless the track is only 200 meters long.

Want thousands to cheer for you but can’t make that pesky Boston qualifying time? I Signed Up For This?!? has the solution.

The Rock ‘n’ Roll people gobbled up another marathon, but if all those marathons are wearing you out, sign up for the next Great 1/9th Miler in Burlington, Vermont. Or you can to the other extreme like Sam Thompson and run to each of Seattle’s 27 public libraries in one day.

The commenters on this Washington Post story hammer the 39-year-old “aging athlete”.

Finally, I have to ask Nitmos, “What took you so long? Johnson here was about to shit himself.”

That’s all for this time, friends. While you’re thinking about whether “The Snot Rockets” would be a good name for a racing team, remember to submit your posts to carnival@runningisfunny.com. Now run away!