Before You Were a Runner

Before you were a runner there is no way you would have paid $90 for a pair of sneakers–every six months.

Before you were a runner you thought people who were running just before a race were insane.

Before you were a runner you would have spit out the sugar water that you now drink every 10 minutes.

Before you were a runner you thought women runners were too skinny.

Before you were a runner you would have called tapering “wearing out.”

Before you were a runner you had no idea how far 10K was.

Before you were a runner you would not have told people you had foot blisters and black toenails.

Before you were a runner you were afraid to go outside before dawn.

Before you were a runner you thought Keflezighi was a rare tropical disease.

Before you were a runner you made fun of people in tights or short shorts.

Before you were a runner you thought nutrition that came out of a squeeze tube was for astronauts.

Before you were a runner you didn’t how ketones smelled.

Before you were a runner you would have laughed hysterically at people doing lunges, strides or butt kicks.

Before you were a runner you never watched running on TV.

Before you were a runner your favorite website wasn’t Running Is Funny, it was this.